Fetish

So, I've recently come to terms with the fact that I have a fetish. I never really understood fetishes. You know like feet, body paint, BDSM, anime what have you... haha. Anyways, I didn't even realize I had one until my friend Karl said it the other day and well OF COURSE. It all makes so much sense now. See I've always had this infatuation with facial hair. Especially beards but unique staches would do as well. I've always explained this infatuation like this:
"The way that men are obsessed with breasts because they can and will never be able to have them themselves, that's how I feel about beards."

And not like well groomed beards but like scraggly sheep herder beards.